Sunday, October 26, 2014

In all (un)fairness....

Life is unfair. It is unfair that I was born in Norway. It is unfair that I have a safe and comfortable home, nice clothes to keep me warm, more than enough to eat, a great family, great friends, and I have been healthy most of my life. 

A long row of unfairness. A long row of Grand Prizes. 

When Geir Espen started having health problems at age 12, I thought how unfair that was to him. But what if we compare his situation to that of disease ridden, starving children in other parts of the world, then what is fair? At least he had access to all the free medical care he needed. 

Then Sigve, at 55, got leukemia, and went through a very dramatic treatment. He had never been sick at all before, so was it fair that his time had come? Again, all the free medical help he needed was there for him.

At age 29, Geir Espen died. I felt the unfairness. 

And now Sigve has to go through this dramatic treatment all over again, and I'm really feeling how unfair that is to him. 

Again I sit here and watch the man I love not being able to eat or speak properly because his mouth hurts so badly. He can barely drink water. He has lost control of bodily functions, and has to wear a diaper. From time to time when his body shakes from the rising temperature, he wraps up under two duvets, and doses off. 

So what is fair, and what is unfair? I guess it's all relative.

And in between, when the temperature drops, Sigve feels better. Fortunately he has his iPad, and he writes his poetry, and when you see his activity on Facebook, you wouldn't think there was anything wrong with him at all. 

Later this evening a nurse came in and asked if Sigve wanted some pain killers for his mouth, he just had to ask. I told her that she was dealing with someone who never used to take pain killers before in his life, and we hadn't even thought of asking. Anyway, she brought him a pill, and 15 minutes later, his mouth actually felt better, and his speech was clearer. Yeay!

I'm grateful for nurses who show initiative :-)

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